Oconto, WI

Oconto River State Trail

Run Time: 63:42 + 2-minute kick

Last sales stop of the day was up in Marinette, just south of the Wisconsin/Michigan UP border, and my hotel was down in the Neenah area. All Trails showed this trail right next to I-41. Looked promising. And it ran perpendicular to the Interstate, so no traffic fumes.

And it started out great. A gravel path that started on one side of the freeway, crossed under, then followed the other side for a half-mile before turning west. Then it diverted away from the county road and headed off through the forest, a mown grass path with nothing but trees on both sides and mostly overhead.

Alas, the tranquility was short-lived. Wisconsin is in semi-flood stage. The moisture contributes to the circle of insect life. I was just far enough into the out-and-back run when they circumlocated me and sent out the call.

It was not mosquitos — too sunny and daylight. It was flies. They were quick to bite. No need to inject some anesthetic to lull us into a false sense of security. They just take a chunk and dare you to kill them. Even worse, I had taken off my shirt to get some sunlight into pale places, so there were sensitive regions exposed.

This trail was well-manicured. It probably doubles as a snowmobile trail in winter. There is a lot of grass in Wisconsin, and I don’t mean the psychedelic kind. Wisconsin is America’s lawn. There are strips of lush lawn grass running through the middle of cornfields.

There are lawnmower manufacturers in Wisconsin as well, at least one of them is on my radar for the equipment trailer they sell. We have tie downs and safety equipment they are looking at adding as accessories. The lawn, as you would know if you’ve read Rachel Carson, is a scourge, mostly because we are too obsessed with its unnatural comfort. It welcomes chemical pollution, and it ain’t what the bees like, unless you let the clover grow in it.

The more bugs I encounter in the Central and Eastern U.S., the more I appreciate the desert climate of Eastern Oregon and Washington, Idaho, Utah, Montana, and Wyoming. Give me the hot, dry wind. Wind is a great equalizer. You have to be a hell of a flyer to navigate the winds of Wyoming. Yes, the red ants are frightening, but only the queen flies, and she is not interested in harassing lone runners.

Could be why all of these trails I find are empty, unless they are urban. My question is: what was the guy on the riding lawnmower wearing as he cut this trail? A beekeeper’s outfit?

I survived, with 8-10 bug bites. Could have been worse. Could have been like when I got into the poison ivy last summer clearing weeds in my own backyard. Now THAT is an invasive species.